October 20, 2007

I know I promised my next couple of posts would be about my problems and when I developed them but I feel this one warrants some attention. 

Today I was visited by an animal control officer and three county sheriff’s deputies.  Isn’t it funny that it takes three officers to tell me my cats are not being properly cared for.  Well actually they are however the animal control officer didn’t think so.  I don’t get it.  Where we are staying there is someone smoking pot just down the hall and the police officer didn’t “smell” it but my cats are comfortable where they are and I’m a bad person. 

Actually I would like to thank the person who has decided to get involved with my life yet again.  I find it funny, when I want help there is no one willing but when I feel I have it under control then everyone gets involved. 

This leads me to my current point.  I feel maybe things would be better if I would move out of here.  I was thinking of moving to a state where no one knows me and starting my life all over again.  I know this sounds strange coming from someone who wanted to live here her entire life but any more I don’t have anything here and what I do have here doesn’t care.  I don’t even think they would notice if I moved away and left no forwarding address.

Ok maybe they would but right now I don’t think so.  The only time anyone in my family notices me it is when they need something or when I have done something so horrible that I could never make up for it.  This is the case.  I called my mother and she then called my brother of course and he said what he always says.  My mother tells me she is busy and she is leaving with my brother and sister in law.  She never tells me where they are going and this doesn’t really bother me but I know it should.  My younger brother doesn’t want to see me while he is in prison.  I know this should upset me however I’m ok with it.  I never had any intentions of visiting him anyway.  It would have been nice to be thought of. 

So as for my move, I haven’t decided where but I have a few months to decide.  I can’t leave the state until my divorce is final which isn’t until mid December.  Until then I will just have to continue on with everything that is going on right now and plan for my future life.

Why do people want to know what is going on in my life?  Is it really that interesting?  Well actually it is but not in the way other people are interested in it.  My ex boyfriend has put me through hell with all of his crap.  He was scared of the dark and all those things which go bump in it.  He used this to fuel our relationship.  When I found out he was lying to me he was gone.  I have four children and they don’t need this.  They need something stable.  So do I.  He wasn’t it and I don’t knows if I will ever find someone who is.

Until then, I will live my life, with all the disturbances and people butting in. 


One comment

  1. Oh, do I hear you! I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve said I need to move to Canada or Tibet or something. I swear, I’d love to just take off to Oregon (NC, IN.. anywhere but here) and not leave a forwarding address.

    People want to know what’s going on in your life because they’re trying to help. While their heart is probably in the right place, it’s hard not to get the impression they think you’re an idiot that obviously needs their intervetion before you screw up again. Ugh.

    BTW, I’m awarding you with the Wonder Woman Award. Stop by my blog and snag the graphic. Pass it on of you like. Forget about it if you don’t. Not everybody thinks you’re doing all the wrong things. I think you’re a strong, smart woman, and wanted to let you know.

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