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One Day at a Time

September 26, 2007

Sometimes I think I need to live my life this way.  I have realized that it doesn’t matter how hard I try I can’t seem to get my life together.  Just when I think it is going to happen for me something changes.  It is like my life isn’t communicating with me anymore. 

I now have a definite date for my divorce to be final.  I will be a free woman before Christmas.  I can’t wait.  I don’t know that things are going to change for me just because I got divorced.  I could go out if I wanted to but I don’t.  Instead I sit at home and watch the grass grow.  Right now this is more true than ever before.

I know I’m not going to be one of those party girls just because I can.  I’ve already done that.  I went wild about a year after my husband left.  I’m past that phase in my life.  What phase I have moved into is currently unknown to me right now.  I hope my next phase in life includes some much needed R & R. 

I could use a good vacation.  One where I can get away from it all.  No kids, no worries, no camping.  And maybe it can be somewhere warm.  I’d almost like a vacation like Stella.  I need to get my groove back!!!

I know some of you are thinking ewe no you don’t need your groove and ewe….but hey “even big girls need lovin’.”  That is something one of my brothers friends has said to me before.  I find it appropriate in my case right now.  Keep in mind he wasn’t talking about me however later I found out he really didn’t care who he was talking about (I soon stopped speaking to him).   

Anyway…I know life will soon turn around and hopefully for the better.  Until then I sit here watching the grass grow wanting more…

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